How do you become the big hero in a "little story?"

Recently I was in Amersfoort at the People's Library. Here you don't borrow books, but people. Because you can read people too, is the idea. I borrowed Marja; a woman, a little older than me, who has had to learn to live with her illness. "Only when I had found the words to describe myself with could I make it my own story," she told me.

That sounds nice: finding words and using them to write a personal, own story. But before you can find words, you often have another step to take: finding your subject.

Everyone feels like the main character in their own life movie. But we are reluctant to share what we experience and what touches us. Especially in business settings. After all, as a true hero, we should be stronger, more heroic or more special. And so we keep our most powerful stories quiet. An eternal shame!

"Where there is perfection; there is no story to tell," said poet and novelist Ben Okri. And so it is. Precisely in the "crisis" is the tension. Not the successful outcome, but the transformation is the story. The conflict the protagonist must resolve, the illusion he or she must face, the sacrifice that must be made. All of us are bursting with such experiences. Small and large. They are a source of insights and life lessons. And that is exactly why they are worth telling.

Draw from this source and you have the key to connecting with your audience.

Easier said than done, finding such an anecdote. Therefore, here are three tips to get you started.

1. Think small

It doesn't have to be an ascent of Mount Everest, escape from a plane crash or existential crisis.

Everyday situations in particular evoke recognition and capture the imagination. Everyone also understands that with that small story you want to make something bigger clear. So look for small events.

If you do choose a grand theme, bring it back to a concrete, small situation, as they managed to do in the movie Zoolander:

. Give it meaning

Every day we experience things that affect us. Positive and negative. Ask yourself: why do I care about this? Is this connected to a larger theme? And what does that teach me?

This is how you make yourself hero in your own story.

Scientist Shawn Achor here gives meaning to a seemingly trivial childhood memory and connects it to a larger theme:

. Have a little courage

If crises are the driving force of a good story, you will have to bare your bottom. Only if you show something of yourself can you touch others. Paradoxically, this is exactly what you get recognition and respect for. Herein lies the identification.

So be a real hero and dare to expose yourself!

On top of the world and yet showing the back of your tongue, that is what Ariana Grande does in this admirable award speech:

Would you like to learn the best storytelling skills and discover how to use them in your own communication? Then come to the training Storytelling: become a master storyteller!
(This training is also given in-company)